Assertiveness 

Assertively saying no to the requests of others rather than giving in protects the relationship from ressentment that would arise if you felt like you had to say yes when you really didn`t want to.

Know what your values and morals are and stick to them. When people ask you to do something that goes against your values you aren`t going to feel good about yourself if you agree to their request.

(The Dialectical Behaviour Therapy Skills Workbook for Bipolar Disorder – Using DBT to regain Control of Your Life – Sheri van Dijk MSW)

12 von 12 or: a Day in Pictures

My Morning Coffee.

This picture is part of a new photo project, which I (sporadically!) started a few weeks ago and which shall be revealed when it is a bit more advanced. I`m excited about it, because I think it is beautiful, interesting, marketeable, and it also has a personal meaning to me.

This picture also introduces our new coffee machine from Lidl. Our beautiful cherry red Gaggia died after a long and happy life, bang on on the day that these were on offer and received excellent reviews. I find it (and its accessories) a bit light in weight, which I still haven`t got used to, but it is easy to use, makes good coffee, and it looks stylish, too.

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My lillies have come out!! They are beautiful and fill our whole kitchen with their lovely scent! In addition to a really generous collection with more flowers, those were a gift from an individual who wanted to give me something just from her. I feel loved!! Fortunately, our cats do not seem interested, as lillies are poisonous to them.

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Tearing out pages from my big Pukka Book to free it up for another hobby project (which I will talk about a bit more in a later post). While doing so, I discovered a rather interesting page I wrote while studying the first module of my Business Degree (I just cannot believe that I`ll be starting module 4 in only a month` time!!): What makes people happy at work:

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Breakfast. Scrambled egg is always a winner.

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Liking today`s page of The Accumulator :-):

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Today, I`m going to dehydrate some tomatoes (sprinkled with salt and oregano, drained overnight – drink the juice!) and apricots (flavoured with cinnamon).

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The latter were not bought for dehydrating, but getting a bit mushy, so I decide to bake a cake with them, adding a twist to a cherry crumble from a book which must be more than 20 years old. (I just noticed that I wrote 13 August on the receipe, and I got a feeling I know why, but I promise that these are yesterday`s photos!!)

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Bit burnt, but highly likely because this was my first attempt at coconut flour:

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Coffee and cake at my friend`s house. We are a group of three, and one is missing, but couple time with each is important, too… You can see her mirror image on the tiles, but she knows about the blog and says “that much” is okay. 🙂

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A rather honest picture of my dinner:

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The other half arrived late from a day out, and he bought some fish and chips which the other members of the household feasted on:

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The Accumulator Fitness Plan

I`m not usually that big on book reviews, but I just cannot resist praising The Accumulator, which I discovered while looking for inspiration on getting fit at home.

The concept is dual (diet and exercise), slow (ie not at all overwhelming) and promises to be very effective: Over 30 days (You can do that!!), you adopt one good (eating related) habit and one physical exercise (2 levels of difficulty to chose from, no equipment needed for either). It`s only two double pages to read every day, and the exercises take a minute each (the programme asks for duration rather than repetitions).

Each excercise is repeated the next day in addition to adopting a new one, so on Day 1, you will be expected to excercise for 1 minute only, which will increase by just one minute a day until you are excercising for 26 minutes on Day 30 (there is 4 rest days) – so do-able that I literally started the minute I finished the brief chapter for Day one – I just got up and did my squats before sitting down again and reading on – while being effective enough for me to feel really sore already on what`s Day 4.

All does not end after 30 days: you can increase the intensity of your excercises to a Difficulty Level 2, or you can increase the duration, while re-reading and re-interating a piece of dietary advice every day… Those are all mainly commen sense, but I don`t think a brief reminder in this respect has ever hurt anyone.

Price: just the £12.99 for the book. No special excercise equipment, fancy foods or diet supplements needed.

Everybody can do that, those short of time, breath or money 🙂 Absolute gem!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

What`s Instagram coming to?

I used to really like Instagram, and actually prefer it to Facebook. However, I am starting to get quite frustrated with it recently, and actually for pretty much the same reasons as Facebook. I used to think Instagram was for enjoying good photos, but this no longer necessarily seems the case.

The “follow/unfollow method” is so popular, that it`s actually got its own name, which comes up on Google. I actually started to take the time to find my unfollowers and do the necessary. I could name two which have followed and unfollowed me twice more after that. I`d lie if I said I do not care about the number of followers I have, but I do care about the reasons and want to be followed for genuine enjoyment of my content.

Another word which I didn`t know existed until rather recently is “thirstbait“. I already knew exactly what it was and was glad to see that`s got its own term, too. I try to entertain my followers with good quality photography relating to a few recurring themes, and I was proud when my followers reached a three digit number and my likes reached twenty, but when i compare myself to the, often very mediocre, accounts of those girls who post little else but close-ups of their own body, I just cannot help but wonder… No, not jealous at all, just a bit sad that narcissism (and its encouragement) seems to have arrived here, too… 😦

Charity

Obviously, I still don`t quite understand charity in Britain. My colleague has been around the village fundraising, and she came back upset because she left one small shop empty handed. It was not that they didn`t offer her anything, they just couldn`t establish who could make a decision.

“She`s looking for a wee donation…” one of the ladies said into a telephone, and my colleague self reported interfering: “No, it`s NOT just a wee donation, I am looking for, I showed you a letter on headed paper from (our organisation)!” I bet she shouted. The lady offered to take her phone number, but my colleague proudly cited herself: “It`s alright, don`t bother, but thank you for your support to your community!”

But it`s voluntary… Or isn`t it?

Political Correctness gone Mad

I had an email today, about a colleague from another department, obviously not known by name, needing something: “She`s always really chatty, with a big smile, always laughing…” Turned out she was referring to the only woman in the entire building (150+ staff) who is black. What`s the world coming to, if you cannot even use the color of her skin to give a physical description?