I finished work at 8pm last night, and that`s me off until Tuesday morning. Those delicious prospects were enough to relax me, drink not required.
Earlier this week, we had a couple of days in London, and I must admit that those were testing. Imagine hubby and I, tired but in an extremely cheerful mood, in a rather nice Italian restaurant, eating a wonderful fish stew and… Yes, I would have loved a glass of white with that, but what exactly would it have added? The moment was perfect as it was; the wine is just a habit, but a thing that can be done without.
The next day we met a friend we haven`t seen for years. She caringly suggested a mocktail bar, which turned out to be too far away, and then a juice bar, which closed at 5pm. The vegetarian eatery where we dined instead had a highly appetizing cocktail menu rather prominently on display. I must admit, I really fancied one, and I also would have liked to participate when my husband and my friend decided to share a bottle of wine. But once again, why? The evening was lovely and couldn`t possibly be enhanced by alcohol. Later, we did a little pub crawl, and as I was sipping my lime and soda I was grateful to be sober. Because for me, it`s all or nothing. If I had had that Bellini, I`d have had the wine, and had I had the Bellini and the wine, I`d now have moved on to pernot diet coke, and then my husband would have had to drag me home. When we came back to the hotel just after midnight, I was tired but fresh and envirogated at the same time, and that`s how I still felt in the morning where easily a hangover could have spoilt our last day.
Another friend was messaging me about my birthday party: “PS: bubbly is cooling!” I replied that I`m not drinking at the moment, and she asks: “Not even a cheeky Kir Royale on your birthday?”
Memories are conjured up of only a bit over two months back, of her and I in her beautiful kitchen baking for Christmas and sharing a whole bottle of champagne and cassis while doing so. My inhibitions to help myself decreased by the glass, my drink became darker every time, I was giggling about nothing and was so happy I wanted to grab her and dance. Later, we had dinner with wine and our other halves, and when this was gone and a glass of whisky had with dessert, I just couldn`t say my goodbyes quickly enough and go home to bed. I was working the next day and remember lying sleepless thinking why, oh why, did I do that again?
“I`ll do my very best to try to tempt you,” she was teasing now, and after having second thoughts I texted back please don`t, I`m really needing this break.
I can`t give in to the first person who pesters. I haven`t really missed drink other than feeling an occasional slight pinch of missing out, so there is no need to re-invite this into my life other than social pressure, which I never considered an excuse for anything. I`ll have a good time without the bubbly. I like the idea, but I`d either get tired of it all before the night is over or suffer repecussions the next morning.
As I really cannot take much drink, and neither can I have just one. And as a grown up, I need to accept this.