Alcohol free – over a month

I finished work at 8pm last night, and that`s me off until Tuesday morning. Those delicious prospects were enough to relax me, drink not required.

Earlier this week, we had a couple of days in London, and I must admit that those were testing. Imagine hubby and I, tired but in an extremely cheerful mood, in a rather nice Italian restaurant, eating a wonderful fish stew and… Yes, I would have loved a glass of white with that, but what exactly would it have added? The moment was perfect as it was; the wine is just a habit, but a thing that can be done without.

The next day we met a friend we haven`t seen for years. She caringly suggested a mocktail bar, which turned out to be too far away, and then a juice bar, which closed at 5pm. The vegetarian eatery where we dined instead had a highly appetizing cocktail menu rather prominently on display. I must admit, I really fancied one, and I also would have liked to participate when my husband and my friend decided to share a bottle of wine. But once again, why? The evening was lovely and couldn`t possibly be enhanced by alcohol. Later, we did a little pub crawl, and as I was sipping my lime and soda I was grateful to be sober. Because for me, it`s all or nothing. If I had had that Bellini, I`d have had the wine, and had I had the Bellini and the wine, I`d now have moved on to pernot diet coke, and then my husband would have had to drag me home. When we came back to the hotel just after midnight, I was tired but fresh and envirogated at the same time, and that`s how I still felt in the morning where easily a hangover could have spoilt our last day.

Another friend was messaging me about my birthday party: “PS: bubbly is cooling!” I replied that I`m not drinking at the moment, and she asks: “Not even a cheeky Kir Royale on your birthday?”

Memories are conjured up of only a bit over two months back, of her and I in her beautiful kitchen baking for Christmas and sharing a whole bottle of champagne and cassis while doing so. My inhibitions to help myself decreased by the glass, my drink became darker every time, I was giggling about nothing and was so happy I wanted to grab her and dance. Later, we had dinner with wine and our other halves, and when this was gone and a glass of whisky had with dessert, I just couldn`t say my goodbyes quickly enough and go home to bed. I was working the next day and remember lying sleepless thinking why, oh why, did I do that again?

“I`ll do my very best to try to tempt you,” she was teasing now, and after having second thoughts I texted back please don`t, I`m really needing this break.

I can`t give in to the first person who pesters. I haven`t really missed drink other than feeling an occasional slight pinch of missing out, so there is no need to re-invite this into my life other than social pressure, which I never considered an excuse for anything. I`ll have a good time without the bubbly. I like the idea, but I`d either get tired of it all before the night is over or suffer repecussions the next morning.

As I really cannot take much drink, and neither can I have just one. And as a grown up, I need to accept this.


9 thoughts on “Alcohol free – over a month

    • culbia says:

      No, I can`t, or let`s say – I don`t want to. It`s like one praline or one ball of ice cream. It whets the appetite, and then you have to stop. I want to either drink as much as I like (which can become a problem with diminishing inhibitions and reason) or not at all. I find sobriety easier than having just one or two glasses.


  1. Lilith says:

    Hab die letzten WE, bedingt durch diverse Parties und Einladungen, auch einiges an Wein getrunken. Jetzt hab ich noch einen Rest von vielleicht 2 Gläsern in der Flasche im Kühlschrank, die trinke ich heute noch und dann ist erst mal Sense. Irgendwie genießt man ein Glas Wein nicht mehr so sehr, wenn man es zu häufig hat.


      • Lilith says:

        Stimme ich Dir zu, das ist aber heutzutage mit fast allem so, finde ich. Alles ist fast jederzeit zu haben, man muss sich selbst auferlegen, nicht immer und überall alles zu essen/trinken/kaufen.


  2. Vic @ Dad is Cheap says:

    Good for you for staying strong! With me my vice is food – all the horrible delicious food that’s not good for you. I need to be better about just cutting that stuff out because once I have one (french fry, chip) it’s all downhill from there.


    • culbia says:

      I used to struggle with food, too. . I found the secret to be teaching myself to love only healthy things and seeing the harmful things for what they are -stuff you really don`t want to put inside your body. That way, I don`t feel deprived eating well. It`s now second nature (although I still have a sweet tooth)


  3. weltbeobachterin says:

    Seit Weihnachten habe ich nur zum Geburtstag Alkohol getrunken, wenn man das einmal nippen als trinken zählt. Mehr Problem habe ich da mit Kuchen, Schokolade etc.

    Liked by 1 person

    • culbia says:

      Bist Du denn wieder daheim? Ich finds (inzwischen!) vollkommen okay, Kuchen und Schokolade zu essen, so lange man sich an vernuenftige Mengen haelt. Seit ich nicht mehr dieses “alles oder nichts”-Denken habe kann ich das auch, und dann setzt es auch nicht an sondern haelt mich bei Laune! 🙂


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